Your Emotional “Shades of Grey”

StockSnap_2R354XL83ZAs I write this blog, the second book in the “50 Shades of Grey” series has its movie debut. The books were international best sellers. They took the world by storm, and quite frankly, by surprise. They represent a different lifestyle as seen through the eyes of a young woman just moving into the real world of adulthood after finishing college. Just as her universe is expanded in ways she never dreamed of, and she learns about an alternative lifestyle, so too, do we learn about our own 50 shades of grey in our personal life story. (Maybe not in the same way, but…)

Some people view the world not through “rose colored” glasses, but through glasses that portray everything to be either black or white. These individuals have rigid thought patterns with little or no room for compromise or discussion. The term “it’s my way or the highway” would best describe their attitude even if it is unspoken.

In the day to day world around us, there is very little that is actually that cut and dry. Most of the events and relationship issues land somewhere in between black or white, and I would go so far to say that there are many more than “50 shades of grey” in regards to our life experiences. Yes, we have certain things, such as the bills we have to pay that are very black and white, but the rest of our life experiences involve and revolve around matters that engage our heart, and emotions then come into play. Our past experiences color our present perspective, and so many issues are not as clean and clear as they might be to others. When these past experiences that are coloring our present happened when we were young, they are still seen from that perspective- from the age we were at the time the event occurred. We did not have all of the tools or maturity to see an event for what it really was. We saw it from the eyes of a child. We relive it from that perspective too. So, in other words, when we have not healed around an emotion that surrounds an event from our past, we go back emotionally to the age we were when the first event happened, and react in the present moment from that earlier perspective. We need to heal our wounds to live a life fully rooted in the now. With that healing comes a deeper emotional freedom.

Healing can come from guided imagery. In the mind, everything is happening in the present moment. When we relive negative moments, or replay negative tapes in our mind, in our mind it is happening again- NOW. Our body then sends out the fight or flight response mechanisms, and the chemicals sent throughout the body do damage all over again. Not to mention we feel miserable all over again. In imagery, we can take the same phenomena and use it to our advantage. We can go back to the moment in time and heal it. It is an amazing process! In imagery everything that is seen has a symbolic meaning, and it is fascinating to see how the experience within the imagery itself and the symbolism go together like a hand in a glove! It is a very empowering experience, and can be life changing.

So, what then is the symbolism regarding the color grey? When most of us think of the color grey, we think it to be rather dull, lifeless, dreary, and the energy of a grey day makes us think of sitting inside with a good book. In imagery, grey represents all colors combined in perfect balance, harmony, and understanding. Not too shabby, huh? Think about what your life might look like if it were in perfect balance, harmony, and understanding. What would be different? Let’s focus for a moment on what perfect balance (or any balance for that matter) would look like in your life. What changes could you make as you look at your current situation that would move you in the direction of balance? Are there some small steps you could start taking right away that would move you closer to that and help you feel better? Are you working too much, or not enough? Are there times when you play? How is your time balanced? Do you have a balance in your solitude and in your time with others? Do you like the life you are currently living? Some semblance of balance is necessary to reduce the negative side effects that stress causes to our body. We need to take this into account during our day to day activities.

What about harmony in your life? We can have harmony in one area of our life and discord in others, or vise versa. Where are you in regard to this quality of life? Within our circle of influence there should be room for those we treasure, and to not let anyone else decide who those individuals should be for us. This is a personal choice, which can bring discord in relationships when someone outside ourselves tries to force us to include or exclude people in our life. Do you love what you do? If not, are you ok with working to provide a living, and then have an exceptional home life? Are you at peace with who you are, and the life you are currently living? Is there discord in any of your relationships? Are you ok with that, or is there something that you can do to rectify it? Life is short, and we have no guarantee that we will be here tomorrow. Can you live with the way that your current relationships stand if that person were to die before you might see them again?

Where are you in your life with understanding? This encompasses such a wide range of areas in our lives. What are your beliefs? How do you feel about things? How do you feel about your life, the occupation you have, the choices that you are currently making? Do you like where you live in terms of how you want your life to look and be? Are you understanding the repercussions that your choices are causing you, and those close to you in your life? Are you making the attempt to understand not only your perspective in life, but others? Are you someone who jumps to conclusions without taking the time to ask and understand another’s point of view? How might your life change if you took the time to see a topic, or situation through their eyes? Would this create more harmony in your life?

As you can see, balance, harmony, and understanding are delicately interrelated and interwoven. What an incredible combination to help us create a wonderful life! There are many shades of grey in each of our lives with regards to where we are, at any given time, in each of these areas and our many situations, and relationships in life. We each see things from our own perspective, not right or wrong, just ours. I invite you to think about whether there are any areas in your life that might need healing. Is there a repetitive pattern in your life? This might indicate an area that needs your attention and should be addressed so that you can live the life you truly desire- one with more balance, harmony and understanding!

Here’s to all of your many Shades of Grey!